Fathers Day 2013

So I have this beautiful child, my son, he is now 4.5 years old and I cannot see my life without this child. Last week his preschool decided to make some cards for fathers day, and I didn't actually know about it until my son a week ago in the weekend got really upset. He was saying that everyone has a daddy, and he doesn't know his daddy and how much he really want's a daddy. Then I find out from preschool that my son was upset he didn't know his fathers name to write it on the card (I really think they could have read his file first as it is all on there). It was to say very emotional for him and I had a lump in my throat and tears in my eyes. I wiped his tears and gave him a huge huggle (our snuggle/hug)and felt really awful for him. On reflecting everything though I am sure there will be more times like this to follow, especially as my son gets older. I don't really know what I can say to him about his dad, how do you tell a small child that their father knows about them but chooses not to know them? That I even went ahead and got a parenting order and paternity order sorted that took longer than two years so he would know that side of his family? Still his father has never been in the picture, he rang me at 7 weeks pregnant on the phone and told me to make my own decision about the baby and what's best for me but he couldn't be with me and moved on to another relationship a week or so later. I really do not know enough about him or his family history to even share with my son in the first place. Raising my son on my own, well it has been such a beautiful and hard time, like pleasure and pain the whole way, but I can say with absolute certainty that there is nothing I would change because I have this absolutely amazing son that is half my genes and half of someone that doesn't want to know. I refuse to talk to my son about his father whom I thought would finally get in contact once the paternity results were proven. I figured if he gets in touch and they start to form a bond or relationship then yes we would have to talk about his father, but why talk about someone that still does not want to contact him? There has been no contact still since late last year when the results came in that proved parentage. There has been no cards for sons birthday, xmas easter etc, and no emails, no skype, nothing nada despite the parenting order stipulating he get in contact to set up skype dates with his son. I know through his mum that he was apparently reeling from being told he was my sons dad (a year ago) and I also told him right from the start we were having a baby, I had no doubt who fathered this child. I feel like he just is ignoring that he has a son, ignoring this child and yes, he has another daughter who lives with her mum in australia that he has contact with and it seems like it is too much effort to acknowledge he has another child, his first son. I know his own mum knows what it is all about as after her first marriage she raised two boys on her own for a time before marrying again. We definately got off to a rocky start in knowing eachother but we are distantly amicable now because of me proving parentage. So now I am at a crossroads with work and looking at do we stay here and live our lives in the area I grew up and also where my own mother is and friendships we have developed with other mums and children, or do we make it easy for him and move closer down to the south island where I have lived before and where I do have friends and in fact a best friend. If we do finance this massive move and upheave our lives and go there will he actually finally want to have visitation, and be consistent or will he just ignore him or worse be in and out of his life? I don't know what to do right now, but I do know that the beautiful card my son made his dad, is pride of place in the lounge as I said to him, you know that mummy is your daddy too, so why not write that card to mummy? And that is what he did with a big smile. Bless him, he really is a sweetheart :)